Me Too

I was about 10 years old when I learned what men really wanted.

See I was just a kid who enjoyed doing kid things like riding my bike, playing video games with my brother,  playing with my toys (Barbie and GI Joe) and reading.  

After all these years some of the details are fuzzy, but what I felt will never fade away. I was scared, terrified.

I remember going with my brother to one of his friends houses.  I remember staying behind to play video games with the older brother of said friend.  Somehow us playing video games turned into him kissing me and trying to pin me down on the bed.  Somehow I got out of there.  I remember running down the stairs, telling his mom I had to go home and just getting out of the house.  While the details of how we got to that point might never be clear, I will never forget the fear I felt.  How I could feel my heart beating outside of my chest on my way out of that house.

I never told anyone what happened.  I'm not even sure at such a young age I could really rationalize what it was anyway.  I pushed it to the back of my mind and never hung out with them again.  When my brother was going to spend time with them I always declined.

When I saw all the Me Too posts making there rounds on social media at first as was shocked that so many women had a shared experience of sexual assault and or harassment.  Then, I thought back to to 10 year old me and the shock wore off and turned into sadness.  I am sad that we live in a world where stories like this are common place.  I was one of the lucky ones.  I was able to get away from the situation before it became something more serious.  But I still remember...

I wish I could say this is the only time I felt powerless or reduced to the sum of my body parts, but it's not.  It was just the start.....